Tuesday, February 24, 2009

OctoDad? Is That You?

It didn't take too long to find someone crazier than the OctoMom, Nadya Suleman. Yes, I said crazier. More crazy than the unemployed, 33-year old, single woman who lives at home with her parents and has fourteen children under the age of eight. On purpose! Yep, there's someone nuttier than her. That'd be her ex-boyfriend who is willing to admit how much he loved her, that he gave her his sperm three times because of his undying love for her, that he thinks he's the father of the Mocktuplets, that he wants a DNA test to find out if he is actually the father and even if he isn't he still wants to help Nadya out with raising the children because, you know, it's going to be hard. See? Told you. Nutjob.

Meet Denis Beaudoin. According to the LA Times folks, when Beaudoin was on "Good Morning America," he says "...he "might" be the father of the octuplets" because he "...said he donated sperm to Suleman a decade ago when they were dating. He now wants a DNA test to see if he is the father." Um, seriously? Seriously. You can watch the video of this guy (who ends up trying not to cry at one point) over there at The Huffington Post. I watched it and, putting aside my intense dislike for crying men (it's harder for them to move heavy objects for me if they're blubbering), I found the guy to have a story that could be believable. It incorporated the major facets of this fiasco so far (sperm, donating sperm, Nadya wanting children, Nadya lying, Nadya manipulating, you get the point) and they were inadvertently backed up by Nadya herself. There are a few problem areas, but again, what aspect of this ordeal hasn't had a few of those? Every day?

Here's the scoop: Denis (yes, with only one "n". Why do people do that? You folks with whatever it is that you have against the double "n", get over yourselves and spell things properly!) says that he dated Nadya for three years. During the timeline that he gives, he says that he now believes that she was married when she was dating him. For three years? She's crazy alright, but to pull something like that off for that long would be tricky for even the most insane person out there (which she could very well be). So that's a problem.

At some point, she asked him for his sperm. OK, I don't usually ask my dates for their sperm. (Then again, my dates don't have sperm.) But Nadya does a lot of things that most people don't do. And Denis realized this because he said that he thought the request for his sperm was "out of the ordinary" But he made a donation anyway because "...I cared about her so much. And I mean, we were, we were in love. I mean, I loved Nadya very much." And that's when I heard the cuckoo bird alarm go off. And it kept going off because he kept talking. He said that he and his friends had nicknamed her "Giggles" because "She really had a really infectious laugh. You know, just her laugh would, it would make you crack up. It's kind of like she had a real high-pitch, squeaky cartoon voice. And, you know, she was a lot of fun to be around. Just her whole bubbly outward personality was really, really cool." Uh-huh. Well, at least one of them is completely nuts. I don't know which one, but I am leaning toward it being her for sure.

As for the reason OctoMom gave him for why she needed his sperm, he claims "Suleman told him that she had ovarian cancer and was unable to conceive without the help of a doctor." Oh, for cryin' out loud! What the hell?? Oh wait! He also says that "....he donated sperm once at the fertility clinic and twice more gave her sperm at home that she carried to the fertility clinic in a container -- keeping it warm by tucking it between her breasts." OK, that sounds just crazy enough for her to have done.

And what's her take on this? Well, she clearly knows the guy. I make that statement based upon her not saying that she had no idea who he was. The RadarOnline guys said that OctoMom told them, "That guy is definitely not the father of my kids. I know who the father is and I can tell you it is definitely not him." Well, yeah, you do know who the father is. But since the father's name isn't on all of the birth certificates and she claims that all of the sperm came from the same donor, I guess that she couldn't say that his name wasn't on the birth certificates, so obviously it wasn't him. (Why that name isn't on all of the birth certificates is another story, but I think it's kind of related to this somehow.) It was just a weird answer.

(By the way, kudos to the RadarOnline folks. They have been on top of this thing from the beginning. They're out-scooping just about everyone. An excellent source for all of your OctoMom ridiculousness.)

So where is Denis with one "n" going to be if he does get DNA tests and finds out that the Mocktuplets are not his? “Either which way, you know, know that if she needs it I’ll lend a helping hand. She needs help. I mean it’s hard. It’s hard nowadays to raise two kids, let alone 14.” He should know about how hard it is to raise two kids. He HAS two kids. And a wife! The wife is not happy from what he says. (Would you be? No way. Even if he hadn't given her sperm, just knowing that he was so in love with her for three years would be disturbing enough for me.)

Yeah, well, she's going to need some help. Her mother doesn't want OctoMom and the fourteen children living with her anymore. What's an unemployed, single, mother of fourteen children all under the age of eight to do? Probably applying for more food stamps is in the picture. Other than that, it's hard to say what she has in mind for herself. I hear monetary donations aren't exactly flooding in. (That might have something to do with people being just a tad bit annoyed at her living off of the government for the past eight years by collecting disability all the while she's shooting out a kid once every 12 months.)

I don't know what Denis's deal is. He has to know that anyone associating themselves with this nutjob will automatically become as toxic as she is. And I'd like to think that someone who has a wife and a couple of kids would not jeopardize that by wanting to jump in and help a woman who treats her uterus like it's a clown car. There isn't a ton of money involved with this, so I don't know that he can be motivated by the prospect of cashing in other than being paid for various interviews. If she balks on doing DNA testing, then we'll know that something isn't quite right. I mean, we'll know that something else isn't quite right.

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Grannyann said...

I also wonder what is up with those people. He's looking for money and she doesn't want to share. LOL

Mare said...

Well, I should have known. I just read that OctoDad "...will not give interviews but is selling interview text and photos through a celebrity news agency. A representative of the agency, Splash, told the Daily Press the text would cost a $100 fee. A headshot of Beaudoin would also ring up $100." What a loser.