Wednesday, January 23, 2008

Warning: Not Suitable For Those It Was Made For

This episode of Sesame Street is brought to you by the letter 'S' as in "soft, soft headed individuals".

Sesame Street is out on DVD. They start at the beginning in 1969 when the show first aired. There are a few noticable differences between the Sesame Street of today and the Sesame Street of yore. The most noticeable one to me was that Oscar the Grouch was some sort of orange-y/reddish color instead of green. Definitely not something that warrants the DVDs coming with the following warning: "These early Sesame Street episodes are intended for grownups and may not suit the needs of today's preschool child." Huh?

I tried to think of what could possibly have warranted that sort of a warning. All I came up with was that "special relationship" between Ernie and Bert. And I guess that Big Bird was the only one who could see Mr. Snuffleuppagus could technically insinutate some sort of LSD issue. Maybe Oscar in that trash can all the time alludes to homelessness? Nope. None of those.

See, there were kids running through a construction site! They were jumping on old box springs! They were (brace yourselves) riding bikes on the set without helmets!

In one episode, Cookie Monster is relaxing in some sort of reading room, wearing a smoking jacket and ::gasp:: smoking a pipe!! Granted, there's NO smoke that's actually seen, it looks funny as hell, and at the end? That's right. He eats the pipe! Hil-arious. Er, uh, I mean Blasphemy! Or something like that.

Seriously, what in the hell is wrong with people? Let me ask you, did you wear a bike helmet when you were a kid? No, you didn't. Did you ever fall off your bike? Crash your bike? Collide with other bikers? Of course you did. And you're still able to read this! Amazing!

This needs to stop. When TV shows for children come with warnings that say that they may not be appropriate for children, it's gone beyond silly and has entered full blown idiocy. Hey, you know all of those helmets that I do NOT advocate children wearing? How about if all of the adults who think that stuff like this is a good idea be the ones who wear those helmets? Because they are the ones who really need them. They are the ones with the melted ice cream soft craniums that need to be protected...from themselves.

Please stop trying to protect everyone from everything that doesn't hurt them. Please stop trying to keep anyone and everyone from experiencing any sort of pain or harm or rejection or difficulty. Please stop thinking that accidents will always be able to be prevented by simply taking every precaution you can possibly think of for any situation that may possibly occur. Please just allow everyone to go through life and experience it as it comes along and without helmets! We'll all be just fine. AND we'll get to watch Sesame Street without any warning labels! And you'll be fine afterwards. And that's a great thing because that Cookie Monster cracks me up.

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