Thursday, August 16, 2012

Cheeseburger In North Korea

I know that things might not always seem all that great here in 'Merica, but trust me, we got it goooooood.  I mean, now that women can wear pants and everyone else can eat pizza and hamburgers, it's really becoming quite lovely and relaxed around here.  Oh, wait.  No, that's not us.  Yeah, that's North Korea where that just happened.  Wait.  What? 

Correct.  See, North Korea is run by a little round guy named Kim Jung Un.  His father, Kim Jung "Mentally" IL, died a little while back and this 20-something ended up as the new dictator. And now, according to the Daily Mail he's trying to "...rebrand his nation by relaxing a series of laws".  While that can probably only be a good thing, it's amazing that they have these laws in the first place.  Then again, when you're under the rule of a dictator, it's kind of only up to that one guy, so you're really pretty screwed all the way around. 

One of the changes that he made was "...lifting of the ban on women wearing trousers in public."  That's right.  Before just a little while ago in the year 2012, if you are a woman you were not allowed to wear pants in public!  And if you were a woman and you dared to wear pants in public and you were caught, do you know what happened to you?  "If caught, sometimes they would cut your pants right there in public to make it into a skirt." I don't even know what to say to that.  No wonder no one can reason with these people and have them not be so nuts.  That's clearly nuts! 

Speaking of nuts, it's unclear to me whether or not those are on an apparent list of foods that can or cannot be had in North Korea.  But up until just a few weeks ago, some of those foods that were not allowed as they had been deemed "too Western" were burgers, fries and pizza.  Considering that this is a country that occasionally lets its people starve, I'm really not too sure what to make of this.  I'm thinking that the residents would just be happy with food in general, but I guess that in a regime such as this one, you're happy with a little bit of choice.  I wonder what other foods, if any, are still banned.  Can they have tacos?  What about ice cream?  And what exactly does a North Korean pizza consist of?  I'm guessing it's not exactly Pizza Hut.  That picture there is of him visiting a "Western restaurant".  Umm, OK, then.  They haven't been "out West" in a while, have they?

In another move that I found to be a bit creepy, Kim Jung IL and his government officials handpicked small children and gave them the opportunities to "visit zoos, amusement parks, and attend concerts."  It went on to say that "Crowds of enthusiastic kids were seen pledging allegiance, shouting, and crying at the sight of their new leader, who wore the children's symbolic red scarf."  I'd probably cry too if I had been hand-picked by the government to "enjoy myself".  Who knows what would happen to you if you weren't filled with fun and frivolity when the Grand Poobah came to visit?! Off with their heads! 

Like I was saying, we've got it pretty good here.  Heck, we've got it pretty good just about anywhere that isn't North Korea. 

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