Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Not-So Live, Not-So Breaking, Not-So News

Of course, if it's news, CNN is there. And I have to guess that wherever CNN is that they're doing a story, it's because they must think it's news. And if they get there soon enough, it will be billed as either "Breaking News" (See, now, anything else that's taking a "break" is resting. But not news. If there's a "break" involved with news, it's definitely doing something. And yet the news is supposed to make sense out of stories. Oh, the irony.) or it will be billed as a "Live Developing Story" (as opposed to a video made last Tuesday of some guy, sitting at his desk, reading about something that happened a month ago). Either way, both would seem to connotate news that's just beginning to happen and it's important that people know about it!



Thus, when I see the banner "Live Developing Story" on CNN.com, I'm expecting news.




I'm not expecting this:




What the hell? THAT is CNN's idea of a "Live Developing Story"? Which part, exactly, was "developing"? That Theodore Roosevelt actually had a birthday? That he was just then turning 150? ( And since there isn't a Federal holiday did all of the lawmakers and government employees want the day off, so they needed something to waste time and do nothing so that it felt like a holiday?)



How is that a "developing story"? Was it unplanned? Suddenly all of the staffers just burst into a rounding verse of "Happy Birthday To You" without any warning whatsoever? Then a White House page sprinted to the Bat Phone or whatever they use and dialed direct to CNN to "tip them off"? I'm just not seeing it. But as far as the singing goes, that does seem like what went on, according to a one Judie Chrobak-Cox who provided the colorful commentary of "Sang Happy Birthday, had cake." That's it. Hmm. Concise.



If Theodore Roosevelt's 150th birthday is being billed as a "Live Developing Story", you know it's a slow news day. After all, the man has been dead for quite some time now, since 1919. It's not like he was there opening presents and having cake. But if he was then that would absolutely qualify as a "Live Developing Story" and I would definitely want to see that! But seeing the guy below dressing up as Theodore Roosevelt (complete with....stuffed bear?) to entertain the masses at the White House? That I can do without.

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