Friday, September 18, 2009

Winging It

Some things are just inexplicable. UFOs. Snuggies. Leg warmers. Geometry. All impossible to explain. We can now add to that list the on-air comments of a one Ernie Anastos, news anchor at Fox 5 News in New York. I don't know why he said it. I don't know what it means. I don't know why he said it. I don't know why he said it.

Here's the scoop: A couple of nights ago, the Fox5 people were doing their regular news broadcast. The weather guy, a one Nick Gregory, had just finished up with his weather forecast. Nothing spectacular, but then again, he's a weather guy. Who even listens to these guys? You could have NO experience in weather-guy-ing and go to work every day to do that job and get it right at least half of the time. You pay attention to what it's like outside on your way into work and you just sort of use what the weather is like at that moment as a starting point and you'll do just fine. But I digress.

Nick finishes with the weather and turns the newscast back over to Ernie Anastos and his co-anchor, a one very attractive Dari Alexander. It's at that point that an oddly giddy Anastos tells Nick, "It takes a tough man to make a tender forecast, Nick." Um, OK. I....guess. Wait. What the what now?

I wasn't the only one confused by that. It had Nick a bit befuddled as well, which is why he replied, "I guess that's me." What else would you say, really? You're doing a live newscast, so it's not like you can just ask him, "What the hell are you talking about, dude?" No, that won't work. He did the right thing by just agreeing with Ernie's comment. I think. After what came next, it's hard to say, really.

As Nick is just sort of chuckling after his answer and Ernie is in full giggle mode, Ernie says this (which is as inexplicable as the things I mentioned at the beginning and it is also so far out in left field, you can't even see left field any more. Left field is a dot to you!): "Keep f***ing that chicken." Wait. Wait. WAIT!! WHAT?!?!

Yep, that's what he said. "Keep f***ing that chicken." Why he said that is anyone's guess. There wasn't anything in the weather forecast about chickens as far as I could tell. But even if there was I'm not thinking that there would have been anything in there about doing that with the chickens! Don't get me wrong, that would absolutely be news! But I hardly think that the weather forecast would be an appropriate place to bring it up.

Did he mean to say "plucking"? "Keep plucking that chicken." I don't know what he meant. I still don't know why he was talking about chickens in the first place. Now granted, this is the same guy who attempted to give a website address on the air a little while ago and instead of saying "MyFoxNY-dot-com" he instead said, "MyFoxNY-dot-cock." Ah, the ol' dot-cock. Remember the dot-cock crash? That was something! All of those dot-cocks just crashing to earth. Terrible. Just terrible.

The best part of this whole thing is the reaction from Dari Alexander. The look on her face does not change after he says that. She just keep right on staring with her eyes opened as far as they will go. And who can blame her?

The only indication as to what he was talking about (but still no indication as to why he was talking about it) comes from the folks over there at the Sydney Morning Herald. They speculate that "... he was referencing the American "father" of chicken, Frank Perdue." (There is a chicken father? I did not know that.) Those down under go on to say "Perdue, who died in 2005, simultaneously revolutionised the poultry and advertising industries in the 1970s when he fronted his own commercials, ending each one with the phrase "it takes a tough man to make a tender chicken". OK, then. That would seem like that's what he was talking about. But WHY in the hell was he talking about it?! No one seems to know.

I'm just a little bit concerned, however, about Nick's reply to Ernie's direction or suggestion that he continue to have interspecial relations with a yet unnamed and unseen flightless fowl. For Nick to say, "OK, I'll do that." could really lead one to question how he leads his life, but only if we weren't too busy already questioning how Ernie leads his.

The bizarre video is below. Any knowledge as to why the chicken talk in the first place is greatly welcomed and much appreciated.

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