The Oscars are tonight and I don't care about any of it. Oh, sure, I might watch a little bit of it, but it will mainly be to try to figure out why someone thought that Billy Crystal would make a good host this year. Hasn't his ship sailed? Seriously, what year is it? Who is that supposed to pander to? When was the last time he did a movie? Or anything for that matter? (I just checked IMDb. Looks like he did a voice in the movie Cars in 2006. Other than that, he hasn't done much that anyone would have actually seen on purpose. Looks like his last recognizable human role would have been that of the mattress salesman in The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle. I think I've made my point.) Yes, he used to be very funny and very relevant at one point. But that point is so far away that it looks like a dot to you. Eddie Murphy was supposed to host, but that didn't work out for some reason. And someone thought that an adequate replacement for Eddie Murphy would be Billy Crystal?! How does that happen? I don't know.
And I really don't care because, as I have already said, I don't care. But you know what would make me watch? Do you know who Sophia Grace and Rosie are? I didn't either until the other day. They are these two adorable little girls who Ellen has had on her show a few times. They're really into music and did a fabulous stint on the red carpet at the Grammys. (So many people knew who they were! I was so clueless.) They're as adorable as they are hilarious. My favorite quote was when Ellen asked them if they got nervous when they were at the Grammys. One of them answered, "We weren't nervous, but we were hungry." (I hear ya, kid. I can get through just about anything, but I'm gonna need a snack.) See for yourself. They're great. We need more Sophia Grace and Rosie and less Billy Crystal at awards shows.