Top 10 List of Memorable Quotes You Will Soon Forget

The folks over there at the Yale Book of Quotations have compiled a list of the Top 10 Quotes of 2008. In other news, there is a Yale Book of Quotations. And the number one quote was something that wasn't said by the person who was supposed to have said it and the person who did say it isn't really that person. Did you catch all that? If not, don't worry, it will all make sense by the end of this post. (And if it doesn't make sense by then, I don't know what to tell you. I didn't say it was a magic post.)

Now, although it's a "Top Ten" list, there are three quotes that tied for tenth. I am not a fan of the tie; neck or things that are the same. I find it odd that it was the last spot on the list that they had trouble narrowing down the final candidates for. They just couldn't bear to leave at least two of those three off of the list. Let's see if they did the right thing (I'm guessing they did not).

• Number 10: "Anyone who says we're in a recession, or heading into one, especially the worst one since the Great Depression, is making up his own private definition of 'recession.' Those words of incorrect wisdom from commentator Donald Luskin on September 14. Oh, and that was the day right before Lehman Brothers filed for bankruptcy. You know, because of the recession that we're not having.
  
  
• Number 10 - AGAIN: "Cash for trash." That came from Paul Krugman on the topic of the bailout of the financial companies on Sept. 22.
  
  
• Number 10 - YET AGAIN: "There are no atheists in foxholes and there are no libertarians in financial crises." That's Paul Krugman again. (Did he compile this list? They had to have two quotes by the same guy tie for Number Ten??) He was being interviewed by Bill Maher for HBO's "Real Time" which was aired on Sept. 19

OK, nothing personal Yale Book of Quotations That We Never Knew Existed Guys, but those kind of sucked. I know they were Number Ten and all, but they weren't great. They were far from memorable. I mean, all I'm going to remember is that they kind of sucked and somehow I don't think that's what you had in mind.

• Number 9: "Barack, he's talking down to black people. ... I want to cut his nuts off." That was July 6 when Rev. Jesse Jackson learned that he should always make sure his mike isn't live before he starts making comments that he think won't be heard on the air at Fox News.

Now we're talking! That was memorable! Next!

• Number 8: "I'll see you at the debates, bitches." How hot was Paris Hilton when she made that video in response to one of John McCain's TV ads for his campaign. Probably pretty hot, but only because it was in August.


• Number 7: "Maybe 100." That was John McCain on Jan. 3. Would you like to take a guess as to what he was referring to? No, not his age. He was speculating at the number of years that US troops could continue to remain in Iraq. (Ouch!)


• Number 6: "Decisions by the Secretary pursuant to the authority of this Act are non-reviewable and committed to agency discretion, and may not be reviewed by any court of law or any administrative agency." Allow me to translate that: When the Emergency Economic Stabilization Act was proposed by the Treasury Department in Sept. 2008, what they were saying was one guy will be in charge of the $700 billion and he can do with it whatever he wants and no one can say any different, including the Federal Government or the Supreme Court. (Be prepared to see that quote in the list of Top Ten Most Frightening Quotes of 2008 when it comes out.)


• Number 5: "The fundamentals of America's economy are strong." What would have been even more memorable after John McCain said that during an interview with folks at Bloomberg TV on April 17 would have been if he had explained himself instead of letting people think he was a moron for saying that. What he was saying was and is correct. America's economy has a solid foundation. That doesn't mean it won't falter. But the fundamentals of what builds our economy are strong. You just don't say things like that when every other house in the country is being foreclosed on. And you don't do that because why? Because you'll look like an idiot, that is correct.
  
  
• Number 4: "It's not based on any particular data point, we just wanted to choose a really large number." Why, yes! I did mock that particular quote in an earlier post! Anything that ridiculous deserves to be mocked (and by people who are a lot better at it than I am). That little gem was brought to us by Forbes.com on Sept. 23. Now if Forbes.com would only do a follow up article explaining what else they do over at the Treasury Department that seems to involve little more than throwing a bunch of darts at a board with big numbers on it. (I hear they take shots at a pinata when they're trying to figure out what to do with the prime interest rate.)
  

• Number 3: "We have sort of become a nation of whiners." That was one of John McCain's former economic advisers, former Sen. Phil Gramm as quoted on July 10 in The Washington Times. (Number 3 Most Memorable Follow Up Question: "SORT OF?!?!?")

• Number 2: "All of them, any of them that have been in front of me over all these years." OK, that one was pretty good! A one Governor Sarah Palin was describing what newspapers and magazines she reads after she was asked the question by Katie Couric during an interview in which Gov. Palin seemed barely able to utter a coherent sentence, as evidenced by the quote above. The cringe-worthy interview was aired on Oct. 1.
  
  

• And finally, the Number One Memorable Quote for 2008 is: "And I can see Russia from my house!" Ah...the brilliance of comedy imitating life. That was a very funny one Tina Fey during the first Saturday Night Live skit where she played Gov. Sarah Palin opposite a very funny one Amy Poehler in the role of Sen. Hillary Clinton. Fey/Palin was responding to the Poehler/Clinton statement, "I believe that diplomacy should be the cornerstone of any foreign policy." That instant classic aired on NBC on Sept. 13, but you can view it below. The Number One Memorable Quote for 2008 appears right around 1:25 into the classic bit.
  
  

And those are the Top Ten Memorable Quotes for 2008. "Can you believe it, Hillary?"

"I can-not!"

Sphere: Related Content

Fey-lin and Other Celebrity Spawn

Well, here's one you don't hear about every day (I hope). I guess that would depend on how many people that you kind of don't really know all that well (personally, as opposed to physically) would be offering up their teenage daughter (whom you really do not know AT ALL) to babysit for your small child when you were having a hard time finding a babysitter. If you're Tina Fey, it happens to you when you're on the set of Saturday Night LIve to make a guest appearance and give your comedic portrayal of Vice Presidential candidate, Sarah Palin. Oh, and it actually IS Sarah Palin who made the offer.

Apparently, that week that Sarah Palin was on Saturday Night Live Tina Fey needed someone to babysit her daughter, Alice (What is it with 'Alice' popping up all over the place these days?!) and was having a difficult time finding someone to do so. (All of those folks over there and no one can watch the kid? Tina Fey didn't plan ahead? I don't get it.) Well, Eskimo Governor to the rescue!! Right before the show, Caribou Barbie there went up to Tina Fey and asked if Alice was still around and Fey told her that she had found a babysitter and that Alice had gone home. That's when Caribou Barbie says, "Oh, 'cause Bristol would have babysat!" Bristol being her 17-year old pregnant teenage daughter, of course.

Now, I don't know about you, but I'm no so sure how I'd feel about my Mom offering me up as the sacrificial babysitter for someone. Granted, it's Tina Fey (and if you knew my mother, you'd know that the chances of her ever even knowing someone remotely like Tina Fey, or even someone just named Tina, are slim to none) and that might make a difference, but it's hard to really know. Oh, AND it just happened to be Bristol's 18th birthday!

Fey told this lovely tale to Conan O'Brien on his show on October 28, the video of said tale is below.

Being volunteered to do something that your Mom thinks that you should do is one thing, but on your 18th birthday? Granted, being preggers and all that does put a bit of a damper on whatever festivities might have arose if she had not been preggers. (Then again, it was probably the festivities that did arise that caused all of the preggers in the first place.) I mean, come on! You've just turned eighteen, you're on the set of Saturday Night freakin' Live, you're NOT in Alaska and your Mom, who is running for Vice President of the United States, volunteers you tospend your time on the set babysitting for a toddler whose mother just happens to make a living mocking your own mother on national TV once a week! Sure! Happy birthday!

As I was looking unsuccessfully for more pictures of Tina Fey and her daughter (Nice job, Tina! Keep that kid out of the spotlight and give her a chance at normalcy. I can't argue with that.), I came across pictures of other celebrities and their legitimate or not spawn. I was amused.

Here we have Nicole Richie and Joel Madden and their daughter Harlow. It would appear that Nicole Richie is looking for pumpkins. It would appear that Joel Madden is thinking about breasts. What is it with the multiple sets of round objects together? The pumpkins. Her glasses. Even the kid is looking around for something breast-like.

Next is Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise. The child is adorable. And it's not her fault that she came into the being of Katie and her husband, L. Tom Hubbard. But does Katie really look like she's all that into the Mom thing? Had it not been for the camera taking the photo, it's highly likely she was about the shoo the child away. "Go on! Back! Back to the nanny!"

Now, doesn't the 55 year old Dennis Quaid look just thrilled to have a pair of young twins (Thomas and Zoe) to raise? The man looks as if he could not be more angry at his fertile, fertile bride there. He has the look of "I can't believe I'm doing this crap again at my age! Stupid Viagara."

The caption on this photo read "Gwen Stefani's son Kingston Rossdale dresses as a skunk for trick or treating in Beverly Hills on Oct. 19." That explains the perplexed look on the boy's face, as no one actually HAD any candy on the 19th as they were 12 days early for Halloween.

Next, Gwyneth Paltrow goes for a walk with her son Moses Martin while they are in London. She was apparently afraid of he might stumble into the high seas and made sure that he wore a jacket that doubles as a life preserver just as a safety precaution.

This is Selma Hayek and her child, Valentina. Perhaps she should hang out with Katie Holmes, as she too seems ill-prepared and in a bit of shock at the notion of raising a child. To her credit, she does seem overly prepared to breast feed.

Of course, what list of celebrities and their spawn would be complete without a picture of a celebrity and her International Collection of Children. Angelina Jolie, in her black, long, flowing dress and fly-eye sunglasses is seen inconscpicuously walking down the street with her three children of various ethnicities, oneof whom is wearing lime green Crocs. Good thing she has on those big sunglasses so that no one will be able to recognize her! It's only because of an extremely alert photographer who just happened to have his camera with him that this snapshot was possible.

Sphere: Related Content

Campaign-a-Palooza

I have to get this out of my system before the freaking election which is, thank God, less than 48 hours away! If I didn't know better, I'd swear that we'd been listening to Barry and Grandpa John McCain since immediately after Sarah Jessica Parker lost to George W. Bush back in 2004. (Wait. Not her! Geez. I meant John Kerry. A horse is a horse, of course, of course.)

There are so, so, SO many witty and wacky individuals who have used their many talents to craft various campaign signs for the candidates. Campaign signs that the candidates would only use if a) they had a loaded gun pointed at their head, or b) they wanted to lose really, really badly. But neither of those things seem to be applicable (though I still don't know what the heck happened over there in McCain's camp over the past three weeks. It was as if someone let HIM run the campaign himself. And that really doesn't sound like a very strategy, especially given how things are going for him these days.). And that's what the Internet was made for! It's a tool that allows those folks to show off their childish, immature and hysterically funny talents with the rest of the world and all without leaving the comfort of their own home or Starbucks.

Thus, I give to you a conglomeration of campaign sign satire, created by folks who will likely never, ever hold a public office. Behold! Fairly amusing campaign signs when it is less than 48 hours before we get to effing vote!! (I'm sure you will be shocked, just shocked, to learn that it was harder to find stuff that poked fun at Barry than it was to find things that poked fun at John McCain and Sarah Palin. Joe Biden is practically nowhere to be found. Why, oh, why couldn't the others have followed his lead?)

\

I can even manage to squeeze in a few Joe the Plumber themes for you (because who can't get enough of that?!). Behold!




And this just wouldn't seem complete without a few Tina Fey as Sarah Palin references on here. Yeah, I know they're not campaign signs, but she's hilarious, so she gets a free pass on that one. (Besides, it gives me reason to go to a web page of a friend of mine and "steal" her Tina Fey as Sarah Palin pics to use here. Now, she doesn't know I've "stolen" them yet (so I'm not going to link to her page just right now), but she'll know as soon as she reads this. But if I did link to her page, you'd know I wasn't checking it out just for her Tina Fey pics, as she has a pic of herself on there that shows just how absolutely stunning she is. (You know what's even better? Who she is on the inside is twice as stunning as who she is on the outside.) Behold! Tina Fey as Sarah Palin on Saturday Night Live!

Let's just effing vote already!

Sphere: Related Content