Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Hey, Hey, He Was A Monkee

Davy Jones of The Monkees died last week. I know, I know. First Whitney Houston and then Davy Jones. The world of music has gone silent. I don't know how the world made it through. But we did. And then things started getting weird. And by 'weird', I mean that suddenly people started acting like Davy Jones and/or The Monkees were some wildly popular act that has been entertaining the masses non-stop for decades. It wasn't like that. Was it?

According to The Daily Mail, "The 66-year-old singer passed away from a heart attack last weekand while his bandmates are upset, they have agreed to stay away from him burial as Davy's family want a 'low-key- send-off ." Uhhh...OK? Wouldn't it already be low key? I mean, this is Davy Jones. And not the one with the locker, either! (Now THAT might be something!) Sure, we all swooned when he was on the Brady Bunch and we were all thrilled for Marcia that he actually performed at her prom. But we're done now. Really. I'm sorry the great man has passed, but that's about it.

The article goes on to say that "...drummer Micky Dolenz told Billboard: "My understanding is they want to avoid a media circus and the family wants to keep it very, very low-key and very, very private." OK, wait. What is going on here?! Media circus?! Over Davy Jones?! Am I missing something?! I'm just not seeing major media outlets clamoring to cover this. Again, my condolences, but this is just silly.

But wait! There's more! "And you can imagine as soon as one of two or any of us were to show up, it would very quickly be degraded into something that I don't think his immediate family would want to deal with that." OK, now I know this is a joke! Will someone please tell Micky Dolenz what year it is, please? This show went off the air in 1970. That's forty-one years ago! Yes, I realize that they had some hits. Yes, I realize that they sold over 65 million albums. (And while I realize that, I'm still a little stunned by it. Last Train to Clarksville was great, but 65 million albums?) But I don't think that it's going to turn into the crowd that was outside the Michael Jackson funeral or anything. It was Davy Jones! Why is everyone acting like royalty has died?!

Maybe it's just Micky Dolenz who is delusional. Get this: "We've had a sort of unspoken, I bguess, agreement over the years that if it's just two of us getting together we never called it The Monkees." Well, why would you? If there's only two of you? And there used to be four? That's hardly the same. But here's the part that made me laugh: "I can see us getting together to do a memorial concert, of course, but right now I can't imagine anything else happening without the Manchester Cowboy." Wait. What?

The Manchester Cowboy? Who called him that? Anyone? This feels the same way that it did when I read that Owen Wilson's nickname is allegedly The Butterscotch Stallion. No, it isn't. It can't be. That's a horrible nickname. I don't even know what it means! And I don't know what the Manchester Cowboy is supposed to mean either. (I guess he had horses. Is that relevant to this revelation? I don't know. But I do know that I've never heard that even once in the past forty years.)

Look, let's just call a spade a spade. We all loved Davy Jones (I guess) when he was in The Monkees. We liked it when he was on the Brady Bunch. And now he's dead. He wasn't a superstar anymore. He was just a guy. I don't think it would hurt for the Manchester Cowboy's (did I get that right?) ex-bandmates to show up for his funeral. The paparazzi would be minimal, if any at all could take time away from following Snooki around. Godspeed, Davy Jones.

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