Saturday, July 18, 2009

Tat's Not a Good Idea

I wanted to see how many nutballs out there had Michael Jackson tattoos. Turns out, I had only THOUGHT I wanted to know that. It's probably information that I could have and should have done without. But far be it for me to suffer alone and that's why I'm graciously sharing all of my newly found (and instantly unwanted) knowledge with the masses. All nine of you.

First, I stopped by Tattoo Blog to see what they had to say about Michael Jackson tattoos, commemorative or not. They didn't have a lot to say, but they had plenty of pictures, many of which speak for themselves (yet still beg for my pithy commentary).

This person seems to have gotten a Thriller bobblehead character infused into their thigh. An interesting choice, I must say. (What is wrong with some people? Seriously. For the rest of your life, folks. The REST of your LIFE you're going to have that on there. Good luck with that. Oh, and it won't get you laid! I don't care what those guys at the tattoo shop told you.)

And over here at BuzzFeed, we have the Silhouetted One with the phrasing "Born to amuse, to inspire, to delight. Here one day. Gone one night." Oh, and I AM amused all right!

This one was actually the best artistic rendering out of the many, many Jacko tats that I observed. Never mind that it appears as if he is straining at stool. Just try not to think about that. Even though I just said it and the thought will never leave your head for more than 5 seconds.

Now, at least these two chaps did something ridiculous and not admirable in the slightest, but I'll give them credit for not doing anything permanent. Hair will grow back (unless it's burned off whilst filming a Pepsi commercial). It's unlikely that new skin will form over bad tattoos.

This 'Thriller' one isn't too bad, except the expression doesn't look like one of fright like you might expect it would. It's more surprised. Sort of like he's saying, "I'm dead? Whachoo talkin' 'bout, Willis?"

Here's another 'Thriller' one and this one is much better. Granted, STILL weird, but better than the Willis Jackson Zombie above here.
This tattoo must be a tribute to the Black or White song. Doesn't matter if your mullet is black of white.

I don't know how I feel about these with the little feet without legs. I understand that he was a great dancer and all. And really, when it comes to dancing, the feet are very important. They're almost critical to being able to execute the moves perfectly. But I don't know that his shoes AND socks should be dancing without HIM in them! Because really, in real life, that almost never happens. And when you add the hat and the glove, it looks like you have a few of the pieces from your Michael Jackson Mr. Potato Head lying around. (And with all of his plastic surgery, that wouldn't be all that surprising. Where's the nose(s)?)

This person felt that the best way to pay tribute to Jacko was to get a tattoo that made it look as if the King of Pop only had one leg, thus making him the King of Hop.
And while this SAYS "Pretty Young Thing", it most certainly is not. From a short distance, those wings look like freaky eyes. Did PYT have anything to do with angels? With wings? With birds? Any of that? Because I'm not remembering that it did, which is another reason why I find this atrocity odd. (And by the way, that ring or that halo or whatever it is supposed to be in the middle there? Well, regardless as to what it's supposed to be, it looks like a bullet hole, which really isn't the most touching tribute. Then again, I don't know that those wings and "Pretty Young Thing" in barely legible script is all that touching either.)

And finally, in what is probably the worst Michael Jackson tattoo ever (and quite possibly one of the worst tattoos overall!) and in the poorest of taste, here we have Jacko and Macaulay Culkin spending some quality time together. Behold!

Yep. On someone's leg. THAT picture. On their LEG. FOREVER. (I couldn't even imagine.)

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Anonymous said...

your a knob people can get what they want ! twat!

Mare said...

You clearly missed the point. Yes, people can get whatever tattoo they want and they obviously do. Have at it, folks. But those tattoos are not only poorly thought out, they're drawn horribly and look awful. I'm all for a good tattoo, no matter how ridiculous they are. The tattoo is an art form. The tattoos portrayed in this post are hideous AND, if you're trying to do something as a tribute to someone, they're a poor representation of how revered Michael Jackson is to these people.

One other point, Y-O-U apostrophe R-E spells 'you are'. Y-O-U-R spells 'your'.

Thanks for reading!