
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
Awesome Brawling Lawmakers

Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Your Elected Officials Hard At Work


- Nowruz (Yes, the holiday that marks the traditional Iranian new year, that is correct.)

Paid tribute to:
- Cesar Chavez,

- Former Speaker Jim Wright

- The armed forces and their families
- 'Cover the Uninsured Week' (Like with a blanket?)
- A one Sheriff Bill Pribil, (who, as far as I can tell, is just a friend of Mrs. Kirkpatrick, Representative from Arizona)
Correct. The on-premise sign industry. The sign guys. The guys who make signs. Have you ever seen a sign? Was it on a premise? That's it! That's their sign!
Congratulated:
- The University of Louisville Lady Cards,


- Ron Silver (the actor)

Honored:
- Enchantment Wedding Services (wedding planners in Maine, that is correct),
- 90 years of US-Poland diplomatic relations,

- 60 years of NATO

- June 1, 2009, as ``Collector Car Appreciation Day''
And urged:
- The government of Moldova to ensure a democratic election process.
They also agreed to allow the Rotunda to be used for a ceremony for commemoration of the days of remembrance of victims of the Holocaust.
Now, I'm sure you have a few questions about some of these, so I'm just going to start with the most obvious. OK, so...where the hell is Moldova?
We're so doomed. We have the Speaker of the House claiming out loud and to the media and public that the CIA regularly lied and does regularly lie to her and to members of Congress. If the CIA is lying, that's a huge problem, wouldn't you agree? You wouldn't agree if you were a member of Congress, apparently, as no one seems to give a fat rat's ass about it. You know why? Because they all think/know that Nancy Pelosi was lying when she said that! Well, if the Speaker of the House of lying, that too is a huge problem! And what are the House and the Senate doing about it? Commemorating sports teams, honoring the new year in Iran, and trying to convince folks in Moldova to vote on things! And you know what else?! I still don't know where in the hell Moldova is!
After about an extra minute of thought, I've come up with this: If I thought for one second that these Reps actually believed in whatever cause, building, holiday or person that they were praising, then it would be different. But they're just saying stuff because they think it makes them look good. There's no feeling, no substance behind what they spit out. Sometimes, they don't even know what they're talking about. Take this screed from a one Rep. Jackson-Lee of Texas. She was trying to find some way to acknowledge the Houston Rockets (yes, of the NBA), but I'm not even sure that she knew what sport they played.
"There comes a time when you need to acknowledge the hometown team and thank them for their best effort (Not really. There might be a time to do that if they win something! Coming kinda close? Not so much really.). The Rockets wanted to win. They put their heart in it. They came back in game 6. They came back in other games. They were down 20 points or more in other games. (You're not really making them sound all that great by talking about the other games that they were down 20 or more points. You do realize that, don't you?) They lost by a large amount, but they came back. (Came back for what? To turn off the lights? You don't come back from losing by "a large amount". It's over. You lost!) And boy, did they give us a game in game 6." Wait! There's more!
"So you can see the faces of the Houston Rockets. And I'm cheering them on. Congratulations for getting into this part of the NBA, getting into what they have not done before, which is the playoffs. (Um, they've been to playoffs before. Many times before!) So I am grateful for the young team that they are. Some that don't have height, we are aware of the injuries of some of our teammates (Is not having height an injury? Did they lop someone's lower legs off mid-thigh or something?), but Houston is very proud. And we celebrated our Houston Rockets because they did a darn good job. (If all it takes these days to get commended on the floor of the House is to do "a darn good job", then we have really gone over the edge. I did "a darn good job" finishing off half of a pizza last night. Where's my commendation?) It is a good lesson for young people to know in the face of adversity, to keep on keeping on (What was their choice? It was a basketball game! You have to keep playing until the game is over, adversity or not!). That is what sports is all about. And that is what the message is when we tell our children to play, play fair, have good judgment, have integrity and keep on keeping on, and some day, you will be a winner. (Not today, but maybe someday.)
Winners never quit, and quitters never win."
And politicians never do anything.

Thursday, October 30, 2008
Since All Other Problems Are Solved....





- Arlen Specter, R-PA.
- Jack Reed, D-RI
- Pete Domenici, R-NM
- Mike Enzi, R-WY
- Sheldon Whitehouse, D-RI (The guy's name is Whitehouse? And he's a Senator? That's like an ice cream man named Cone. Or a librarian named Bookman!
- Joe Lieberman, IND-CT
- Dick Durbin, D-IL
- Patrick Leahy, D-VT
- Ken Salazar, D-CO
- Bernie Sanders, IND-VT
- Wayne Allard, R-CO
- John Thune, R-SD
There you have it. Your 13 hardworking Senators hard at work to give every American access to the NFL games on TV. A Senator makes $169,300 a year (with an extremely sweet pension deal). I don't know about you, but I'm expecting a little more from these folks for that amount. This is why things economically suck right now. Because these clowns who are supposed to be NOT focusing on NFL games ARE focusing on NFL games. What's the saying? Fiddle while Rome burns? Play a tuba while Athens crumbles? Something like one of those. If it not, then it's definitely HUA Syndrome (Head Up Arse)
I just noticed that only four of those Senators are actually from a state that HAS an NFL team. Wouldn't you think it would be the states with an NFL team whose games they are missing that would be complaining? I would. But there's only four of them and two of them are from the same state!
What is the current approval rating of our fine, soft-headed, dense-brained Senate group these days? 10%? 11%? It's something ridiculously low like that. The accurate and well-deserved low approval rating and the latest revelation that our Senators are spending their time trying to tweak the TV schedule during football season only serves for me to continue to advocate my strongly worded suggestion that, come Election Day, we start over. Vote for every single challenger to the incumbent seat. You have to admit, it doesn't sound like a bad idea. Toss everyone out! Start over! What's the worst thing that could happen? They get an 8% approval rating? Come on, you know as well as I do that if you performed that way at your job, your boss never would have put up with it and you'd have been canned a long time
ago. Your elected officials should be held to the same standards. Hell, they should be held to ANY standard. Out! GET OUT!
I'll be voting for every single challenger on November 4th. Join me, won't you? Afterwards, I'll sit back and play my tuba and wait for a football game to come on a TV channel near me.

Friday, October 3, 2008
Pork, Anyone?



What happened next was the House got together (as much as they could, which is to say, barely at all) and redrafted the 2 page document to include things like having some oversight and not giving the entire $700 billion all at once and things like that. Now that sounds fairly reasonable. Controlling, but reasonable. That "reason" increased the length of the document from 2 pages to approximately 137. I am not kidding. 137 pages of stuff that is mostly definitions of other stuff that needs to be voted on so that the country isn't ruined and you and I don't end up wearing a barrel. (Because really, barrels have never helped anything. You don't need to be poor and destitute AND ugly.)





Tuesday, September 30, 2008
For Cryin' Out Loud, Just PASS The Bill!









Do you know how many freaking committees there are to regulate and supervise the very departments and sectors of the financial systems of this country? Let me list a few. We have:
- The governors of the Federal Reserve System
- The Board of Directors of the FDIC
- The Securities and Exchange Commission
- The Federal Advisory Committee
- The Committee on Banking, Housing and Urban Affairs
- The Committee on the Budget
- The Committee on the Finance of the Senate
- The Committee on Financial Services
- The Committee on Ways and Means of the House of Representatives
- The Federal Housing Finance Agency
The various members of these various committees and boards (and I've just listed TEN of them. There ARE more.) are made up of members of the House of Representatives! These committees and boards are supposed to oversee the financial system of the country and regulate it so that disaster doesn't strike. Well what in the hell have they been doing the past four or five years?! And NOW they're all concerned that something might be done without their oversight? Are you kidding me? You're already supposed to be overseeing things? What have you people been doing??!
Clearly, people weren't doing their jobs. That's nothing new when it comes to elected officials. But what burns my toast is that these people have the freaking nerve to, once again, act all concerned about the situation and what they can do to save it when they were the ones that created the mess in the first place by doing NOTHING! Don't show up NOW and tell me that YOU want oversight. That's what you should have been doing, you morons, you! AND on top of that, those who know their economic stuff are telling you that it is going to be financially disastrous if the now 100+ bill doesn't pass and something isn't done. So what do you do? Do you pass the bill? Hell, no! Instead, you make it so the bill does NOT pass and the stock market drops like the rocks that must in your heads.
So when all of the fraud was going on in the real estate and mortgage lending game, you didn't want to listen then. When you're on these committees to oversee the industry and you learn about these things, you didn't want to listen then. And then after you're told that not giving Federal help to these banks will significantly damage the economy, you still don't listen and don't pass the bill because NOW, suddenly, YOU want to start doing your job? Screw you and don't let the door hit you in your cowardly ass on the way out. (The cowardly ass, by the way, was originally slated to be one of the three characters that accompanied Dorothy on her magical journey to Oz and then was unceremoniously replaced by that lion fellow.) Once again, you showed that you only care about yourselves, being as how a whole lot of you are up for re-election in November and you saw a "yes" vote as being not as politically productive for you as a "no" vote.
Come November on Election Day, I've decided to simply vote for whoever the challenger is to any seat in the House of Representatives that is up for grabs. I don't care if it's a goat rapist running against the incumbent, I'm voting for the goat rapist! And I encourage everyone else to vote against the incumbents as well. Don't worry about what your party affiliation is; just always vote for the goat rapist! I want all of them booted out and I want to just start over. What a bunch of jackasses! If you people wanted to do your damn job so badly, why didn't you?! What was stopping you?!! Oh, that's right, because you're jackasses! Once again, I remind those folks that their JOB was to make sure that NONE of this could HAPPEN! And they're worried about votes? Grand.
Stay tuned and see if either a) the House passes the bill tomorrow, or b) if I have a coronary if they don't. Either one, a fair to partly cloudy possibility. (In the interim, I'd like to apologize to all of the goats out there that I may have offended or frightened by participating in and encouraging the electing of public officials prone to fornicating with members of your species. Sorry 'bout that.)
