Up until now, I have avoided the Trayvon Martin case/incident/subject. But today, I think that I am going to dip my toe in this pool of controversy. And I doubt that I'm dipping in the same pool as a lot of people. This is a completely different pool with a completely different toe. And since that analogy is starting to sound silly the more that I use it, let's just jump right in.
First of all, a whole lot of people have a whole lot of opinions. But really, I don't know that we know enough. Yes, I know that a young black guy who was unarmed was shot by an adult Hispanic male. (He's not white like the media was so quick to make him out to be when this story first came out.) That in an of itself, regardless of color, is not good. But from what I can tell, the public hasn't been told enough about the investigation that went on. That alone tells me that I don't know that I know enough to make an informed opinion. And I don't know that any of these people who act like they have an informed opinion have any more information than I do.
People seem to be all over George Zimmerman's case on this one. And I'm not necessarily saying that they shouldn't be. But shouldn't their anger be more focused (at this time) on the police and their seemingly shoddy work on this one? From what I understand, Zimmerman wasn't even taken down to the police station for questioning. I guess all of the police questioning just happened right there at the scene. I really can't imagine that. How did that go down? "Oh, so you shot him? Self defense? Well, good job, citizen! Carry on! You're free to go." That seems awfully weak at best.
My point here is this: There are only two people on this planet who know exactly what happened and one of them is dead. How we (as the public) are ever going to know for sure what happened is beyond me. Zimmerman says that the kid attacked him. And he did have injuries that were consistent with a fight. Whether or not Zimmerman provoked the kid or started the fight, we will NEVER know. Got that? We'll NEVER know.
I am astounded at how many people want this to be about race. I am seriously appalled at how many people are just jumping to conclusions and assuming that this George Zimmerman guy shot Trayvon for no reason other than that Trayvon was black and that George was a racist. There isn't enough evidence to know that or much else, for that matter. And look, I wish the kid hadn't been shot. Whether or not Zimmerman overreacted, I have no idea. I wasn't there and neither was anyone else. But if we are going to make this about race, could we make some other things about race too? If we're going to get all upset when a black kid gets shot by someone who wasn't black, can we at least get equally upset when a white kid or a Hispanic kid or even an Asian kid gets shot? (The poor Asians. They're always left out of the race wars. I wanted to be all-inclusive.)
That's it. That's me dipping my toe in this mess. Oh, but if only others could be just as cautious with their opinions before spouting off about something that they really don't have enough information about. Yeah, that's not going to happen any time soon, unfortunately. Crap. Just crap.
It's come to my attention that during the 1970s, America was a flaccid, flaccid nation when it came to our music. What were we thinking? Actually, let me rephrase that. What were y'all thinking? I can't take a whole lot of responsibility for any of it, really. I started out the 1970s being 2 years old and there's rarely anything that you can hold a 2-year old accountable for, much less, responsible.
Let's start with a Number One hit from 1974. Paul Anka sang a horribly sappy song called "You're Having My Baby". I don't get this song at all. Allow me to give you a sample of the lyrics if you're not already familiar with this atrocity. Ahem....
That you're havin' my baby
You're the woman I love and I love what it's doin' to ya
Havin' my baby
You're a woman in love and I love what's goin' through ya
The need inside you, I see it showin'
Whoa, the seed inside ya, baby, do you feel it growin'?
Are you happy you know it?
That you're having my baby.
Are you kidding me? "The seed inside ya, baby, do you feel it growin'?" What. The. Hell? And those aren't just crappy lyrics. That was a number one song!! What was wrong with this country?! Y'all listened to that crap? Willingly??
Then there was the David Geddes hit "Run, Joey, Run". I was not familiar with this song until just a few days ago when the fabulous Armstrong & Getty were discussing it on their morning radio show. (Download the podcast of their show over at iTunes. These two are fabulous!) "Run, Joey, Run" is a song about a girl who gets knocked up by her boyfriend. The girl's father finds out and gets angry. The girl's father then proceeds (from what I can figure out according to the lyrics) to hit the girl and then get his gun to go daughter-knocker-upper hunting. She tries to warn the boy, the aforementioned Joey, but he doesn't listen. He comes over to her house, the Dad goes to shoot him and the daughter (I believe her name is Julie) jumps in front of him and the Dad ends up killing her. Top of the charts!
Seriously. What was going in y'all's lives that you wanted to listen to that? Granted, it has kind of a catchy tune and all, but it really gets weird once you start thinking, "What now? A gun? Run? He shot his daughter? What the hell?" I mean, it's really weird.
But here's my favorite weird-ass song of the 1970s. Are you familiar with a song called "Timothy"? "Timothy" was a catchy little ditty by the one-hit wonder group, The Buoys. While the song itself is disturbing to say the least, I'm kind of glad that they only had just the one hit, as I can't imagine how they'd possibly follow up a song about cannibalism. Wait. What now?
That's right. Cannibalism. Pop-culture cannibalism. That song made it inexplicably all the way to Number 17 during the year of our Lord 1971. Number 17. How did...? Wait. I need to fill you in on "Timothy" before I go on babbling about how weird this is.
It seems that Joe and Timothy and "me" (the narrator of this morbid tale with a catchy tune) were trapped in a mine. The tale goes something like....
"Trapped in a mine that had caved in And everyone knows the only ones left
Were Joe and me and Tim....
When they broke through to pull us free
The only ones left to tell the tale
Was Joe and me
Now, normally, you wouldn't think that "the only ones left to tell the tale was Joe and me" would mean that the two dudes ate their freaking friend! You'd just figure that Tim died, wouldn't you? Yes! You would! Because that would be what? Normal, that is correct. But this song is far from normal. And it goes on....
"Timothy, Timothy, Joe was looking at you
Timothy, Timothy, God what did we do"
Huh. I dunno. What did you do? Let's skip a couple of lyrical passages ahead to find out, shall we?
"My stomach was full as it could be
And nobody ever got around to finding Timothy". Oh, God.
Now, according toWikipedia (take it for what it's worth), once folks figured out what the weirdo lyrics were about, it began to demand more airtime and move its way up the chart. When the radio executives began to realize that there was a hit record hidden in this morbidness, they tried to claim, of all things, that Timothy was really a mule and not a person. This was supposed to somehow make the airing of such a song more palatable to the stations and the listeners. I don't know if that worked or not, but the song did make it up to Number 17 that year. I really can't imagine that saying that they ate a mule was going to make the song anymore happy-go-lucky than if it were a person. Don't get me wrong. Eating a mule is much better than eating your buddy. But when it's in a Top 20 song? It's still freaking weird.
Seriously, what would be your next act after you've had a hit with cannibalism? A polka medley about bestiality? Is K-TEL still around? Are they still producing their 8-track collections of various genres of songs? Hits from the 80s? Things like that? If they are, they need to get on this one right now. They need to come out with "Crap We Used To Listen To - The Seventies". They could have a "Crap We Used To Listen To" for all decades, really. It would be a hit. I'd buy it just for the sheer awfulness of it all.
Recently, I've been made aware that there really is too much waste on this planet. It's not like I didn't have some sort of an idea that there was a whole bunch of stuff that gets thrown out every second of every day that is taking up valuable space on the earth. I knew that. I just hadn't fully grasped the magnitude until lately. There's too much stuff and we don't need to keep churning out more, especially if that which is churned out is useless. We definitely don't need more of that. And I found a website that has a bunch of useless crap that is eventually going to end up inundating the landfills and (in all likelihood) the oceans and that's unfortunate. What's even more unfortunate is that the stuff on this website is such crap that I found it amusing.
The site is J-List and it's freaking weird. It's Japanese, but the site is in English. And to the credit of whoever is responsible for the site, they have gone to great lengths to be all inclusive, not only with their products (aka, crap), but also with their descriptions of said products. Lengthy they are. And detailed! Sometimes, with too much detail. The thing with the Japanese is that they never do anything half-ass. Everything there that is popular isn't just popular, it's a crazed craze. It's like everything is a "must have" and if you don't "have" it, you "must" and soon! The Japanese also seem to figure that if a certain item is popular, then an item that is kind of like that item (but not really) will be popular as well. That's when they take their life savings and pour it into that item, only to find out it's ridiculous and worthless and that they never liked the item that was the popular one in the first place.
But here was what I was greeted with today when I stumbled over there (and really, for no apparent reason is this there):
Oh, what the hell is that?! Well, to their credit, they're talking about not being wasteful. After all, Mottainai "essentially means "What a waste!" But their website is just chock full of such utterly cheap and ridiculous crap that no one really needs, it's hard to take them seriously. (That, of course, is my biggest complaint about all of this "going green" stuff. Any entity can make a "green" claim and no one cares if they are or not and there aren't a whole lot of regulations to determine if they are or not. As long as people can believe they're doing good, they don't care if they really aren't, just as long as they think they are.)
And then for no apparent reason, it delves off down this path: "Japan's toilet culture is quite unique, especially when you're coming from the outside. First, there are two types of toilets here, standard Western units you're familiar with -- they come in normal, butt warming and butt washing types -- and washiki or Japanese-style, which you squat over to use." Good Lord, make it stop!! After that it takes off on the expected tangent...that of Hillary Clinton's impending visit to Japan and whether or not she will bring Valentine's Day chocolates for Prime Minister Aso. (Is that really his name? Aso? You know...um...that kinda sounds like "Prime Minister A-Hole", doncha think? It does a little, huh? Hmm. Poor choice. Moving on!)
I knew I'd likely find an enormous selection of craptastic products when I saw that the product list on the top site banner read: "Hentai Manga, Japan Kit Kat, Tenga Adult Toys". Now that's quite the variety of stuff right there. (By the way, the Japan Kit Kat? Yeah, they're strawberry! What is that about?! I don't want a strawberry Kit Kat! OK, well, I kinda do, just to try it, though! But just one!) But I was not expecting this. Behold!
Oh, what the hell is that? That is the Nagomin Body Sponger -- with Long String. Apparently the "long string" is a selling point because we all know how hard a long string is to come by these days, what with the recession and all. (Hard times, hard times.) For more information, this description is included: Japanese bath products are far and wide some of the most interesting in the world. This new, umm -- sponge-on-a-rope is great for washing those hard to reach spots, without the hard scrubbing of a long brush. This one even has a cute face on it, so it seems to enjoy the washing up as much as you do! Has a long thick string tied to both sides and is very absorbent with a soft plush material. It seems to enjoy it as much as I do?? I'm not so sure inanimate objects are capable of that sort of enjoyment, but if they were, I don't think I'd be using that product in the shower. Anywhere, really, but especially in the shower. Little perverted sponge. Naturally, there are variations on the theme.
Continuing the parade of crap, haven't you always yearned to erase your mistakes with an eraser shaped like fruity produce? Your dreams have come true! Behold!
Here's a funky little item that will surely turn some heads. How many times have you found yourself rubbing away with your old eraser thinking, "This is boring!" -- now even erasing can be fun with this wacky electric banana eraser that rubs out pencil faster than you can imagine, thanks to its vibrator action that makes the retractable eraser work great. Will you ever go back to erasing things manually? Who needs pens when you've got a vibrating electric eraser that looks like a banana? Your life will never be the same again. Unfortunately, they're probably right; my life might not be the same if I actually insisted on using the vibrating banana to erase things. It would be lonely, as no one would come near me if I was spotted using that thing. ("But wait! Come back! It's fruit and it vibrates!! Wait!!")
But hey, why limit your love of erasers to just bananas? Actually, why be bound by fruit at all? Break free of the fruit! Break free of the doldrums of buying your erasers already made. Wait. What? That's right. Make your own erasers in the microwave and have them shaped like sushi! Behold!
Good Lord. I'm thinking the planet is worth a heck of a lot more than an eraser that looks like unagi that I cooked up in the microwave. It says that it comes with "...various cut outs to bring that more authentic restaurant feel to your creations." Because if I'm going to be erasing with sushi, I need that authentic restaurant feel, otherwise it's just not the same.
And now onto the Japanese wieners. Wait. What? Among the foreign community, the Japanese are famous for their perfectly cut mini-wieners you find in so many lunches (bento boxes). What's the secret behind these ubiquitous morsels you ask? Why the Wiener Cutter of course.
Guys, I apologize for the term "Wiener Cutter". That's enough to make any guy cringe. (Heck, I cringed when I read it and I don't even have one!) But when was the last time you heard a wiener called an "ubiquitous morsel"? Huh? It's probably been a looooonnnngg time, hasn't it? Good!
Now you too can have the most perfectly cut wieners on the block, and not only that, they'll be shaped like tulips!, complete with a bulb and leaves Be the hit at school. Be the talk of the water cooler clique at work. Wonderfully wacky.
There you go! Wonderfully wacky wieners! Shaped like tulips! But those aren't the only shapes you can cut your wiener into! (Again, sorry guys.) There's more!
"...they'll be shaped like cute penguin!, complete with eyes and arms!"
"...they'll be shaped like cute crabs!, complete with eyes and legs!"
Yep! Crabs for your wieners! Order now! Operators are standing by!
Then there's the Say It In Japanese Publication which claims to "...go into detail over sample conversations and useful expressions to accomplish what you need." Well, I like to accomplish what I need. This should be handy, yes? How the hell should I know? Just look at it for cryin' out loud! Do you know? Behold!
I don't know if I need to accomplish any of that! But then again, I don't know what half of those things are, nor why I would need to know them! The only examples that they give over at J-List are "expressions such as "Me o sara ni suru" ("Saucer Eyes" aka to open one's eyes widely in search for something or someone), "Te ga hayai" ("fast hands" or a womanizer) and "Icha Icha" suru (a couple necking)." So, what I need to accomplish is keeping an eye out for a womanizer and if I see a couple necking, I might have found one? Should I just wait until they're done? Those are strange examples of why I would want that book. (Why is that pink squirrel staring at that watermelon? Is that what goes on in Japan? I've never been. The man above the squirrel does not want that box! And next to him, a samurai fights with wanton letters.)
And finally, one of the more degrading products they had is an item called the Working Women's Simply Style Notepad. It's confusing even after you've seen it, but I'll explain. Behold!
When I saw this, my first thought was, "Do I want cut out sperm on my notes? I don't think I do." But I guess they're not sperm, although they could be. That's up to you and that's part of the intrigue (I suppose)! I mean, haven't you always wanted, as a working woman (sorry again, guys) to have a notepad with a little character? Thanks to J-List, your prayers are what? Answered, that is correct. "Here's a note pad with a little character. Simply use the pad to write notes and reminders to yourself when necessary, however there are 3 flap that can flip up allowing you to create different characters that allowing you to create different expressions based on what you draw on them. Great for making parodies of yourself or others in order to liven up the day." Why is this weird thing just for women? I don't get it. I suppose I should appreciate the thought, but if I'm going to "liven up my day" I'm going to do so by drinking six martinis at lunch. That alone will liven up a lot of people's day, not just mine! Count on co-workers, the boss, the cute copy chick and security to have their day livened up as well!
Look, this stuff is a riot and all, but only because it's just so ridiculous. We don't need this crap on the planet. Please stop. There's only so much room on the planet and I really don't think that we need to be taking up space with items that their sole purpose is for us to have pretty and shapely wieners. It's just crap and there's too much of it. Make something worthwhile and then we'll talk. But right now you'll have to excuse me. I just heard my microwave timer go off and I need to go check on the DIY Bunion Pads that I cooked up!
If the Gallup Poll numbers released today are any indication, it would appear that we can look forward to at least four years of having things skewed in President Barry's favor as to make him appear to be even more God-like than he is perceived as being. That sounds like great fun, doesn't it?! Ugh. Today, Gallup (who I generally like and tend to find validity in the polls that they do), with seemingly nothing better to do than crap like this, released the results of a survey done by conducting telephone interviews of 1,591 adults Wednesday to Friday. The results show that 68 percent of Americans approve of Barry's performance. Wow! 68 percent! That's amazing! That's like...hey, wait a minute. He's only been in office for THREE DAYS!! Oh, wait. Sorry. He had been in office for three days for the folks that were polled on Friday! For the folks that were polled on Wednesday, he hadn't even been President for 24 hours! How are you supposed to answer that question?! "Um, well, OK, I...I guess." Would you really have a reason to disapprove less than 24 hours later? (That question posed as if you were an impartial observer giving a fair and balanced answer. Hahahaha!!)
Seriously, what would it take for people, after THREE DAYS, to disapprove of the job he's doing? Turn the White House into a pyramid? Start sagging his pants and wearing a baseball cap crooked? Put those two adorable little daughters of his up for auction on eBay? What would it take?
The article by the Associated Press states "That's a number near the high end for new presidents, but short of President John F. Kennedy's 72 percent in 1961." The article then goes on to seemingly reiterate that statement, but it turns out instead to be completely useless information that they're continuing to give us when they write "Among presidents elected to their first term, Kennedy had the highest initial job approval rating, 72 percent, in Gallup polling three weeks after his inauguration." Three weeks! Why are they polling people on President Barry only three days (or less) after his botched and flubbed inauguration? And why are they comparing it to other polls that they've conducted after three weeks?!
In more misleading and useless information, we're told that "The poll also found that 12 percent in the survey disapprove of Obama's job performance, a typical number all presidents face after an election." OK, so that's typical, right? That's what it says, but that's not what it says. Later. That's not what it says later. Not much later, but later. "Compared with his immediate predecessors, Obama faces fewer Americans who disapprove of his performance." But wait! You just said....
They don't care. They don't. I know they don't care because they threw out a contradicting statistic, hoping that you had forgotten what you had just read less than two minutes ago and are SO dumb that you'll find this new factoid simply lovely! "Clinton faced 20 percent disapproval after taking office in 1993, and George W. Bush faced 25 percent disapproval after the Supreme Court delivered him the presidency in 2000." Well, 20 percent and 25 percent do not seem like the typical 12 percent that all Presidents face after an election, now, does it? NO!!
This is either crap journalism, crap reporting or crap surveying methods. It's crap and it's one of those. I know that it's one of those because it's only been THREE DAYS since the man was sworn in and they're acting like a poll that was conducted after three days (TOPS!) is indicative of what a wonderfully popular president he is already! Whose idea was this survey anyway? Whoever it is should be fired, as they are clearly a moron. And having morons in charge of things or just running around making decisions all willy-nilly is never a good idea. Ever.
Three days. Three. If the Gallup folks had called me for this survey, I'd have to say that there's at least a 50% chance that I yell at the poor pollster. (Unless I was one of the folks that they called on Wednesday, less than 24 hours after the inauguration. Then there is a 100% chance I yell.) There's absolutely a 100% chance that I would refuse to answer that question. It's whether I would just decline to state an opinion or whether I would absolutely state an opinion (and most likely state it loudly), but it wouldn't be an opinion that they could check off a box on their tally sheet for. It would probably be an opinion that would get me on the Mandatory Do Not Call (Under Any Circumstances) list.
So the Associated Press is in the tank for President Barry. Good to know. I'll keep that in mind whenever I read any future articles they may write about President Barry. That way I'll be able to spot the bias more quickly which will enable me to spend less time reading Associated Press material as I will be moving on to another news source rather soon. What is wrong with you people?
For the 127th time, yet another example of what makes me absolutely insane about the current state of the news reporting media. The overly arrogant and wrongly acquitted double murderer, OJ Simpson, was sentenced yesterday, basically for being OJ.
No, not because everyone knows he killed two people and got away with it. "Being OJ" refers to his attitude that he has flaunted ever since his acquittal. His arrogance, his aloofness, his oh-so-casual-yet-oh-so-not attitude that he displayed whenever he was in public (which was quite often, considering he was golfing every day whilst looking for "the real killers"). Those things compose the "being OJ" category. After all, that's what compelled him to go busting into a hotel room in Vegas with a bunch of moronic, career criminal thugs in an attempt to get "his stuff back". Yeah, you can't really do that. If someone has your stuff and they're not supposed to have it, common sense dictates that you go to the cops, not to your posse. (Then again, common sense also dictates that you do not nearly lop off the heads of your ex-wife and her friend in the courtyard of her condo either.) As you may or may not care to acknowledge (because, please, hasn't this man taken up enough of our time as it is?), OJ was found guilty of every freaking charge that was filed against him in relation to this unsuccessful, borderline-IQ-masterminded, property-recovery mission. Yesterday was the glorious sentencing! After reading numerous different accounts and publications from a variety of major media news reporting sources and outlets, I don't have a freaking clue as to how long he was sentenced for.
Everything is different. And not just a little different. Different-different! Maybe I should add them all up and then find the average. Here's what I know (or don't know. I don't even know if I know or not. How sad is that? Thanks a lot, media guys. You're a big help.):
New York Times - OJ Simpson is sentenced to at least 9 years in prison.
Associated Content - OJ Simpson sentenced to at 15 years. (Eligible for parole in six.)
About.com - OJ Simpson sentenced to 16 years in prison. Eligible for parole after 7 1/2 years.
Associated Press - OJ Simpson sentenced to at least 15 years in prison.
Los Angeles Times - Simpson is sentenced to at least 6 years in prison.
E! Online - OJ Simpson sentenced to 15 years. Eligible for parole in nine.
Fox News - OJ Simpson sentenced to Up to 33 Years in Prison.
McClatchy Washington Bureau - Simpson gets 18 Years "I'm sorry for all of it, " he says.
New York Daily News - Simpson headed to prison for up to 21 years.
About - News & Issues - OJ Simpson sentenced to 17 years in prison
Examiner.com - OJ Simpson sentenced to 18 years in Prison
Pro Football Weekly - Simpson receives 15-year prison sentence. Eligible for parole after five.
San Jose Mercury News - Judge sentences Simpson to maximum of 33 years in prison. Simpson eligible for parole in nine years.
The Associated Press (yes, again!) - OJ sentenced to as much as 33 years.
The Press Association - OJ Simpson sentenced to a minimum of 18 years.
People Magazine - OJ Simpson sentenced to 17 1/2 years.
MSNBC.com - OJ Simpson sentenced to long term
What the hell, media guys? Nine. Fifteen. Sixteen. At least fifteen. Fifteen. Up to thirty three. Eighteen. Up to twenty one. Seventeen. A minimum of eighteen. Seventeen and a half. Long term? (Way to take a stand there, MSNBC.) It's not like half of them reported 14 years and the other half reported 13 years. No. Between nine years and up to thirty three years, that's a span of 24 years! You can't even make an educated guess as to what his sentence was when you have such a broad range of choices.
The Press Association wins the award for the worst reporting of this topic with this account of the situation: "O.J. Simpson on Friday was sentenced to a minimum of 18 years by a Nevada judge. The 61-year-old will be eligible for parole after serving five years and faces a minimum prison term of six years." What the hell, Press Association? What the hell is that?
I think there should have just been a standard headline for just this one time. It could read: " If you care, he's going to jail for a long time." Oh, of course I could be more witty, punny, pithy even, but after at least 13 years of having to see that jackass and his smug face in the news every other week, I'm saving pithy for those deserving of pithy. A lot of media outlets must have felt just a bit of that same sentiment, as some crammed the OJ "news" into the headlines with other stories. We have:
Auto deal in works....Rest of TARP funds may be used...OJ behind bars
Simpson sentenced...More home debt troubles...Bush defends Iraq war
Judge shoots down NFL...Simpson heads to jail...Seahawks lose
OJ gets 15 years..."Shocking" job cuts...Ticketed in labor....
I'm not sure who is more pathetic, OJ Simpson or the folks over there at USA Today and what they were calling "Instant Analysis on OJ Simpson's Sentencing." I kid you not, this is what USA Today is passing off as "legal analysis" from a "legal analyst" these days: "With sentencing complete for O.J. Simpson, here are some of the instant reactions from ESPN's legal analyst, Lester Munson:
-- "The judge was very angry with O.J. Simpson, that was very clear." And when Simpson tried to explain his actions during the robbery, "He took a terrible risk . . . I don't think that did him any good at all."
(Since when does identifying 'anger', an emotion that most people who are not lawyers are, in fact, familiar with, qualify as 'legal analysis? And if something is "very clear", isn't it thereby unnecessary to state that which is "very clear"? At the very least, leave the "very clear" out, even if you feel so compelled to point out what "angry" looks like. Perhaps USA Today should have had Big Bird do his legal analysis. It seems to be on about that level.)
-- On the judge's comment that she began the trial wondering whether Simpson was arrogant or ignorant, and "Now I know the answer, it's both.": "It was not a big surprise for her to say that. She's a judge who has a flair for the dramatic. It was no accident that she said that. She was using notes."
(Wow. A judge not accidentally speaking. Amazing! Of course she has notes! And again with the restating of the obvious "It was not a big surprise...." From what I can tell, my cat could do better legal analysis than this and I don't even have a cat.
- Summing up, on Simpson: "I'm not so sure how he went so far wrong here. He has lawyers at his disposal. He is not totally stupid. He somehow went totally off course here."
That is where the guy becomes completely discredited in my book because OJ is totally stupid. If nearly lopping off the heads of two people 13 years ago and then getting miraculously acquitted of the crimes doesn't persuade you to live the life of a law abiding saint but rather that of a smug, condescending, self-righteous a-hole who continues to have run-ins with the law, then yes, you ARE totally stupid. Explain to me how ANY of OJ's behaviors since he "allegedly" murdered those two people are NOT totally stupid! Oh, you can't, because they are totally stupid. And so is he. Man, how do I get a job as a USA Today "legal analyst"? Seems pretty cush to me. Just sit around and state the obvious. End every analysis with "Water? Still wet. Back to you." It would be my dream job
Before OJ was sentenced, he was allowed to make a statement. And he made a statement alright. The statement that he spoke out loud and the statement that his statement made about himself. To quote the great Bugs Bunny, "What a maroon." As he stood there with tears in his eyes and a snot bubble in his throat, he ended up sounding like a little kid who was trying to get out of being punished for something he had been caught doing. He thought that he was trying to make himself sound remorseful and that it was no big deal to anyone who was actually involved, so why should it be a big deal to the State of Nevada? The thing was that his rationale was a bit ramble-y and off topic-y. It was also nothing less than completely pathetic. (Not so tough without your knife, are you?) He threw in things like:
"In the past, as we know, as you heard on the tape, Mike Gilbert tried to set me up in a porn video, tricked me into a room with hidden cameras and they still wrote in the newspaper and tabloids, they still had cover stories that OJ did it even though there was no porn video. Even though I didn't participate in it."
(Was he just talking about porn? Did he mention a porn video? Porn? How did porn get thrown into this? I mean, bravo, Nevada court system! Bravo! But seriously. Porn?)
"I think 'Hey Mike.' I yelled at him. And I think 'Hey' just like I yelled at Bruce and Beardsley and I've forgiven them. We've talked about it, Beardsley and I the next day, and, uh, Bruce and I hugged, have talked about it."
You hugged?! Oh, my dear Lord, now I have heard everything. You hugged. Oh, my God. Did he expect the judge to get up and yell, "I'm convinced! You're normal and caring! Bailiff! Release this gentleman and get me a mint julep! Or something like that!" Are you kidding me?
"My family knew what we were doing. And I don't want to hurt Bruce. I didn't want to hurt any of these guys. I know these guys. These guys have eaten in my home. I've done book reports with their kids. I've sung to their mothers when they were sick."
So he's a sick mother singer AND a book reporter doer! Fab-ulous! What does that have to do with anything? Oh, right. Nothing.
"I just wanted my personal things and I realize that was stupid of me. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to steal anything from anybody and I didn't know I was doing anything illegal."
Didn't know he was doing anything illegal? See? Again, my point. Totally stupid.
The folks over at the AP have the entire statement of ramble posted if you're interested. There's about five minutes of video of the ramble below. Somewhere right around the 1:00 mark is when the inexplicable mention of porn arises. And I'll say this: If it wasn't OJ, I wouldn't believe that someone would have actually had the balls to stand up there and play the victim. But because it is OJ, I'm not surprised. He has thought that he was invincible and untouchable for the majority of his life and that sense of self entitlement and self importance only became greater after his acquittal of not one, but two murders. There is no one on the face of this earth who ever has thought or who currently does think more of OJ than he thinks of himself. He is a legend in his own mind. And he's going to have a lot of time to hang out with that legend as he sits in his little cell for....(I forgot we still haven't pinned down an exact sentence)....a while. For a while he'll be doing that.
And please, someone tell me what is up with the dude in the background there.
It's karma. And I've decided that karma is short and has sharp teeth. That's why if you're not careful, it's so easy for karma to bite you in the ass. I believe it was someone wise (or a fortune cookie) that pointed out that karma, while often referred to as being "a bitch", was really not a bitch, but was rather, a virgin. If karma was a bitch, it'd be too easy.
Double murderer finally sentenced to prison. No one cares. Back to you
Up until now, I have avoided the Trayvon Martin case/incident/subject. But today, I think that I am going to dip my toe in this pool of controversy. And I doubt that I'm dipping in the same pool as a lot of people. This is a completely different pool with a completely different toe. And since that analogy is starting to sound silly the more that I use it, let's just jump right in.
enough. Yes, I know that a young black guy who was unarmed was shot by an adult Hispanic male. (He's not white like the media was so quick to make him out to be when this story first came out.) That in an of itself, regardless of color, is not good. But from what I can tell, the public hasn't been told enough about the investigation that went on. That alone tells me that I don't know that I know enough to make an informed opinion. And I don't know that any of these people who act like they have an informed opinion have any more information than I do.
People seem to be all over George Zimmerman's case on this one. And I'm not necessarily saying that they shouldn't be. But shouldn't their anger be more focused (at this time) on the police and their seemingly shoddy work on this one? From what I understand, Zimmerman wasn't even taken down to the police station for questioning. I guess all of the police questioning just happened right there at the scene. I really can't imagine that. How did that go down? "Oh, so you shot him? Self defense? Well, good job, citizen! Carry on! You're free to go." That seems awfully weak at best.
and one of them is dead. How we (as the public) are ever going to know for sure what happened is beyond me. Zimmerman says that the kid attacked him. And he did have injuries that were consistent with a fight. Whether or not Zimmerman provoked the kid or started the fight, we will NEVER know. Got that? We'll NEVER know.
I am astounded at how many people want this to be about race. I am seriously appalled at how many people are just jumping to conclusions and assuming that this George Zimmerman guy shot Trayvon for no reason other than that Trayvon was black and that George was a racist. There isn't enough evidence to know that or much else, for that matter. And look, I wish the kid hadn't been shot. Whether or not Zimmerman overreacted, I have no idea. I wasn't there and neither was anyone else. But if we are going to make this about race, could we make some other things about race too? If we're going to get all upset when a black kid gets shot by someone who wasn't black, can we at least get equally upset when a white kid or a Hispanic kid or even an Asian kid gets shot? (The poor Asians. They're always left out of the race wars. I wanted to be all-inclusive.)
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