He Paints With What?

Look, all I know is that there's this guy who calls himself Pricasso because he paints pictures using only his wiener as a brush.  Well, that's not totally accurate.  It's just the brush strokes for which he uses his crank.  The backgrounds are all done by using butt cheek prints.  (Wow.  Versatile.)  The weirdest part?  (Yeah, it gets weirder.)  The weirdest part is that he's actually kind of good.  I mean, it seems like he's kind of good.  His pictures actually look like something.  The subject matter is certainly more recognizable than when a gorilla throws paint at a canvas and someone calls it art.  I am sort of basing this assessment solely on my perceived and assumed inability to be able to paint anything with my body parts, though.  There's a video of him doing his thing below.  Behold! 
 

  

OK, I don't know about you, but I don't know if I could ever actually buy one of this guy's paintings and have it in my house.  They're only fifty bucks each, which is quite a bargain for art these days!  But the fact doesn't change that the painting has had his schlong ALL OVER IT.  And really, I'm not looking to start that sort of trend in my home.  Just because it's OK for one guy to rub his wiener all over a canvas, does that mean it's OK if my guests start doing that as well?  (Yes, yes, I'm misanthropic.  But occasionally I'll have people over.  And occasionally, one of them will have a penis.  Do I want him getting out of line?  I think not.)  I can't even think about the butt cheeks part of this whole equation.  In some ways, I think that revolts me more than the penile painting does.  Seriously, what's wrong with a brush?  Couldn't he be quirky in some other way that doesn't involve genitalia?

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Boring Predictions From 1910

Currently, I am in possession of a laptop that is not my regular computer. Unfortunately, this laptop does not seem to have an overly functional spacebar. And it's making me crazy. The backspace key is getting quite the workout. Therefore, I'm going to attempt to save my sanity and cut this short today. Below are some drawings that are allegedly from the year 1910 and they depict what the world in the year 2000 was imagined it would be like. I must say, they weren't very creative back then. It's a wonder we've progressed as far as we have, really. I mean, if that's what ninety years of progress looked like to them at the time, could you imagine how blown away they'd be with all of the stuff that has actually been accomplished and invented?! Don't get me wrong. I'm pretty sure that people are dooming themselves as a species these days. But at least we won't be going down in a boring fashion. (Click on the image below to make it bigger. (That's what she said.) And if I knew who to credit for these designs, I would absolutely do so. But I really have no idea who drew them, nor where they first appeared. If you happen to know, please relay that information to me so that I can give appropriate credit and not appear like some thieving Internet plagiarist. I've been called a lot of things, and most of them were probably pretty accurate. But one thing that I am not is a thief and/or a plagiarist. Even I have standards.)

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Don't Wash Me

You know when a car is just filthy, filthy dirty, how someone thinks that they're being cute by writing "Wash Me" in the dirt on the window? Yeah, it's not cute and it's not going to persuade anyone to actually wash their car simply because you left them a grimy reminder. OK, well, that's out! Got it? "Wash Me" is out. The Mona Lisa is IN! Wait. What?

The fine folks over there at The Sun introduce us to Scott Wade, a 49-year old dude from Wimberley, Texas who, after moving to a residence with a dirt road that got dust on everything, honed his artistic talents and began churning out what can only be described as art. Behold! The Mona Lisa on what appears to be a Mini!

Holy crap. That is ridiculously insane.

Scott is a graphic artist who has been doing his car art for a while now. He uses his fingers and he also uses more "traditional" art tools. You know, paintbrushes, stuff like that. He also uses the not-so-traditional set of tools, like chewed Popsicle sticks.

The thing is, it's not like Scott can save any of these creations. He gets them on there and they'll stay until it rains and then that's it. Seems like an awful lot of work for something that you know is just going to be mangled by Mother Nature.

Scott's website has many more examples of his dirty car art, all of which are equally as impressive as these I've showcased here.

And just in case you were wondering, here's Scott:

You know, that's probably about what I expected. Nice job, sir.

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