The WOTY is What Now?

It's Word of the Year time! The WOTY! (Good Lord, if I ever use the term 'WOTY' again just in just a casual context like I just did, please shoot me.) Every year, for some reason (and I'm blaming The Internets), the Oxford English Dictionary, the ol' OED gives us what they have deemed the Word of the Year. They are, apparently, the only ones who get any say in this sort of thing. I'm actually glad about that because if it were left up to the general public to vote, the Word of the Year would almost always be something like "hella" or "piehole", both of which barely qualify for words as it is, let alone Word of the Year. What I'm not so glad about was this year's winner.

And the Word of the Year as dubbed so by the folks over there at the Oxford English Dictionary and no matter what you say is.......

UNFRIEND

Wait. What now? "Unfriend"? You mean as in to remove someone from your Facebook because they were being a douche to you? I thought it was "defriend". What in the hell is "unfriend"? Well, according to the Oxford University Press (that would be those who do the OED), "unfriend" is "defriend". And while according to OUP that "unfriend" is "defriend", according to me, "unfriend" is wrong.

If I were the only one to think that it should be "defriend" instead of "unfriend" it probably would not stop me from ranting about it. But I am not the only one who thinks that it should be "defriend". In fact, so many people were doing the Scooby head tilt at this one that they asked the OED people what they were thinking how they came to this conclusion. According to a story over there at ABC News, a one Lauren Appelwick, a publicist with Oxford University Press, Inc., said, "Unfriend was chosen because it's much more common than defriend." She also stated that she "couldn't elaborate on Oxford's methodology." Right. Because if we all knew how you came up with the lame-ass "unfriend" as being more popular than "defriend" then we'd all be going out there and doing our own word popularity studies. Uh, no. (Translation: We blew it, but we're not telling you that. "Unfriend" is our story and we're sticking to it.)

She added that "It's funny because there seem to be little clusters of people who have never heard the word "unfriend,"...but added that research indicated that "unfriend is far, far more popular." Yeah. It's funny, all right. Hilarious. Hmm...I don't know about folks who have never heard of the word "unfriend" (that seems completely unlikely unless those "clusters" are folks who are over eighty), but you know who doesn't use the word "unfriend"? That would be a one Chris Hughes. Who now?

Chris Hughes. You've probably heard of what he's accomplished rather than who he is. He's one of the three guys who invented freaking Facebook. According to Syracuse.com, Hughes says “I was surprised that that was the word that they’ve chosen." The article also stated that "Hughes says that’s the term he and his friends use" and "Instead of “unfriend,” he would have gone with “defriend.” But, the OED folks did extensive research that they're not going to explain to us, but we're supposed to take their word that all of us who have only used "defriend" are in the minority (perhaps even in the "clusters" with the oldsters). Whatevers.

Over there at the Oxford University Press blog, we learn that according to a one Christine Lindberg, Senior Lexicographer for Oxford’s US dictionary program. “It has both currency and potential longevity. In the online social networking context, its meaning is understood, so its adoption as a modern verb form makes this an interesting choice for Word of the Year." Oh, it's an interesting choice all right...because it's wrong!

In order to make the incorrect choice of "unfriend" for Word of the Year, the OED folks had to sift through some other words which they held in contention for the title. Of those, I have heard of most of them. The ones that I don't think I have ever heard used in the mainstream lexicon of English speech would include:

intexticated - distracted because texting on a cellphone while driving a vehicle (See, I don't call this behavior "intexticated", I call this "being a dumbass".)

choice mom - a person who chooses to be a single mother (Sooooo....lesbian?)

deleb - a dead celebrity (I have never run across this term being used anywhere. And really, after the 24/7 coverage that went on way too long covering the demise of Jacko, I'd really prefer that they don't refer to them as any particular term and that they just stop talking about it, for cryin' out loud.)

paywall - a way of blocking access to a part of a website which is only available to paying subscribers (Yeah, the term is pay wall, not paywall. Oh, but don't worry. It really is "unfriend"!)


Other words in the running which I am thankful did not take top honors included:

birther - a conspiracy theorist who challenges President Obama’s birth certificate (Translation: Moron.)

death panel - a theoretical body that determines which patients deserve to live, when care is rationed. (Theoretical? Shouldn't that be hypothetical? I don't know of a scenario in which that theory would be applicable. But don't worry! It's unfriend! For sure!)

And my personal favorite: teabagger - a person, who protests President Obama’s tax policies and stimulus package, often through local demonstrations known as “Tea Party” protests (in allusion to the Boston Tea Party of 1773)

Yeah, that's not quite exactly what folks are meaning when they're using the term "teabagger". See, I think that the term that the OED folks are looking for is teapartier or teapartier. See, a "teabagger" is a somewhat derogatory term due to the fact that it's a slang term meaning to place one’s scrotum on the face, eyes or mouth of an unsuspecting person. It is in no way a pleasant experience for the one getting "teabagged" (as the description would imply. A scrotum that isn't yours in your face? Very unpleasant indeed.)

But again, don't worry! They're sure that it's "unfriend".

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Speaking of Words

It's Word of the Year time again! No, it's not my invention. (Not that I'd admit it if even if it was, but it isn't, so I'm not. So there.) It's the concoction of the, surprise, New Oxford American Dictionary folks. (Actually, that is a little surprising. Isn't Oxford over there by London? That's not "new America". That's "old England". I don't get it.) Regardless, over there on the Oxford University Press blog, OUPblog (unique), they've announced that it's their "absolute favorite time of the year". Favorite time, eh? Huh. Interesting. They claim that they "prepare for the holidays" by making its "biggest announcement of the year", that being the unveiling of the WOTY, Word of the Year. You know, if announcing which word is the word for the whole year qualifies as their "biggest announcement", I'm guessing it's not all hustle and bustle around those offices during the other 364 days of each year. I'm just sayin'.

But back to the WOTY. (I absolutely hate that acronym. It's horrible. But I'm not about to type out "Word of the Year" every time I need to write it. So WOTY it is, but I'm not happy about it. Just so you know.) The dumbass word for the year 2008 is a word that takes things like thrift and a desire to conserve and takes them to a ridiculous extreme which is often at the expense of annoying (and frightening, in some cases) others. The word is......Hypermiling. Wait. It's what?

Hypermiling. According to the dude who coined the phrase, a one Wayne Hypermile Gerdes, to hypermile is "to attempt to maximize gas mileage by making fuel-conserving adjustments to one’s car and one’s driving techniques." Sounds like "driving slower", doesn't it? That's part of it, but that's only the most normal part. While it involves things such as driving at or below the speed limit, maintaining the correct tire pressure, not letting your vehicle idle and eliminating excess cargo (passengers do qualify as "excess cargo" in this case, yes), hypermiling also involves things such as:

• Driving without shoes (to increase the foot’s sensitivity on the pedals) (also known as "Driving home from the beach."),


• Parking so that you don’t have to back up to exit the space, and


• “Ridge-riding” or driving with your tires lined up with the white line at the edge of the road to avoid driving through water-filled ruts in the road when it’s raining.

Yes, driving with tires lined up on the white lines. Are you kidding me? I was under the impression that those "water filled ruts" on the road were so you didn't engage in another driving technique, that of hydroplaning! While it is true that you will be saving gasoline as your car glides atop the sheet of water without the tires even touching the asphalt and sails uncontrollably across the Interstate before careening into a semi-truck and bursting into an inferno of flames, it's really kind of worth it to use that extra tablespoon of gas and keep your damn tires on the freaking road! But that might just be me. It's hard to say. But whatever, that's your WOTY. Try not to kill yourself.

Interested in the WOTY Finalists? No? That's too bad. You're going to be a little disappointed right about now, because here they are:

• Frugalista: "A person who leads a frugal lifestyle, but stays fashionable and healthy by swapping clothes, buying second-hand, growing own produce, etc." (OK, when did "growing own produce" become "frugal" as opposed to "granola"?

• Moofer: "A mobile out of office worker – ie. someone who works away from a fixed workplace, via Blackberry/laptop/wi-fi etc." Sooooo...everyone? The moofers and the shakers? Isn't this what you yell when you have one of those hypermilers in front of you on the freeway? "Moofer to the right lane so I can pass you, you jackass!" Ah, I thought so!
  
  
• Topless meeting: "A meeting in which the participants are barred from using their laptops, Blackberries, cellphones, etc." So if you're a 'moofer', just be prepared to 'go topless'. For the good of the company, of course.
  
  Toxic debt: "Mainly sub-prime debts that are now proving so disastrous to banks." So, sub-prime mortgages? (Why do they do this? Are they trying to be all tricky? It doesn't work.)
  

And not only were the WOTY Finalists, there is also a WOTY Shortlist! They don't really tell you what the "shortlist" is exactly, but it seems to be perhaps the rest of the words that weren't good enough to make the finals, but were in the running at some point. They didn't make the finals because most of them are lame, but without them, it would have been a really short list. And when you're promoting your WOTY, you don't want to look stupid. Everyone knows that.

• Carrot mob: "A flashmob type of gathering, in which people are invited via the Net to all support and reward a local small ethical business such as a shop or café by all patronizing it at the same time. Also as noun, carrotmobbing." (Never heard of it. This is possibly something the WOTY folks made up to fill out the list of WOTY candidates.)
  
  
• Ecohacking: "The use of science in very large-scale projects to change the environment for the better/stop global warming (e.g. by using mirrors in space to deflect sunlight away from Earth)." Are we doing this? Where exactly are these big mirrors? Is that why it was so hot today? It's November, for cryin' out loud! Knock it off.)


• Hockey mom: This is self explanatory. ("Lipstick" noticeably absent from WOTY list.)
  
  



• Link bait: "Content on a website that encourages a user to place links to it from other websites." Huh. So it's not using sausages to catch fish. Interesting. Note to self....
  
  
• Luchador: "A wrestler, an exponent of lucha libre (Spanish for ‘free wrestling’.) They might mean "an opponent", as "an exponent" is a math notation designating the power of a number. But, then again, maybe it's right and it just means "powerful Mexican wrestling guy". Maybe.


• Rewilding: "The process of returning an area to its original wild state/flora/fauna etc." But what was it before it was "rewilded"? Is that process "dewilding"? "Unwilding"? "Miswilding"?


• Staycation: "Vacation taken at or near one’s home, taking day trips, etc." Also the last and least well-known installment of the Chevy Chase 'Vacation' movies.


• Tweet: "A short message sent via the Twitter service, using a cellphone or other mobile device." I thought that was 'Twittering". But it's 'tweet'? So to Twitter, you tweet? If you're tweeting, you're Twittering? If you tweeted, you've Twittered? Is there a Puddy Tat involved with this? It feels like there should be.
  
• Wardrobe: "Has become a verb, as in: Ms. Mendes has a long-standing relationship with the house of Calvin Klein and has been wardrobed by Calvin Klein Collection." So, "dressed"? "Wearing clothes"?

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Everybody Likes A List

Researchers at Oxford University, having run out of anything to do involving academia, apparently, have spent their time compiling a list of the Top Ten Irritating Expressions. ("Researchers at Oxford University" surprisingly absent from list.) The purpose? Well, their claim is that they "...monitor the use of phrases in a database called the Oxford University Corpus...The database alerts them to new words and phrases and can tell them which expressions are disappearing. It also shows how words are being misused. " My claim is that it's a list and everybody loves a good list. That's all it is. It's trivial drivel presented in list form in order to draw attention from those who like lists. And who doesn't like lists? No one. Everyone likes a list. If you don't like a nice list every now and then, there might be something seriously wrong with you.

But back to Oxford's list. According to the folks over there at The Telegraph, a one Jeremy Butterfield has written a book called Damp Squid, which the article says was "named after the mistake of confusing a squid with a squib, a type of firework." Great. Now not only do I have no idea what the title of the book means, I have no idea what the explanation of the title means as well. (A squib is a firework? Like those little ground bloomers? Roman candles? What's a squib?) All of the Top Ten Irritating Expressions appear in the book. It's unclear to me if anything else also appears in the book.

So, starting from ten and working up to one, the Top Ten Irritating Expressions as deemed so by the guys over at Oxford with nothing else to do. Ahem....

• Number Ten: It's not rocket science I'm going to add that its cousin phrase, It doesn't take a rocket scientist can be interchanged and also makes the list. I think it's so annoying because people that use it are clearly not rocket scientists (not to mention that 3 out of 5 of them think the phrase is actually 'pocket science', which is even more annoying).
  
  
• Number Nine: 24/7 Irritating, indeed; mainly because no one is ever going 24/7 unless they're high on crack or have a meth lab in their basement.


• Number Eight: Shouldn't of Yes, this is one that makes me insane. What happens is people get a little bit too hooked on phonics and instead of saying "shouldn't have" the "have' becomes "huv" and then, eventually just "of". What's worse is when people start writing it that way as well. That makes me even more crazy.
  
  
• Number Seven: It's a nightmare Rarely is the situation being described actually a nightmare, true. If it were, you could just wake up and all would be good! But it's not. You might think it is, but look around you. Are you being chased by two-headed demons? Are you giving a speech naked? No? Then it's not a nightmare.
  
  
• Number Six: Absolutely Probably would not be as irritating if it weren't overused. Rarely is anything 'absolute' except for the vodka and even then it's only 'Absolut'.
  
  
• Number Five: With all due respect This is one of those phrases that is meant to excuse what you are about to say which is in direct contradiction with the phrase itself. If you're saying, "With all due respect..." and then you're following that with "....you acted like a cheap slut at the office party..." that's not "with all due respect", you know? Similar phrases would include "No offense, but..." and "Not to be rude, but...."


• Number Four: At this moment in time I don't hear this one all that often, but it is irritating. I think probably because it's redundant and it's also stating the obvious. "At this moment", well, which other moment would it be? No one ever says "At that moment in time" or "At no time in time". Why do you need the "in time"? What else is there? "In space"? "Within the continuum"? Irritating. Definitely.
  


• Number Three: I personally I find this one hilarious, only because it reminds me of poor Miss Teen South Carolina at the Miss Teen USA Pageant 2007 when she answered the question posed to her about why she thought 1 in 5 Americans could not identify the United States on a map. Her answer was nonsensical, rambling and absolutely hysterical. And she started it off with, "I personally believe..." and continued with "...that some, uh, US Americans are unable to do so because, um, some people out there in our nation don't...HAVE maps." And it only got more funny from there until the very welcome 'time's up' bell mercifully sounded to end her blathering diatribe.








• Number Two: Fairly unique This phrase, along with its cousin, very unique, turns my uncle into a crazy man. When he hears either one, he must nearly shout that if something is 'unique' it means that it is 'one of a kind'. Therefore, something can't be 'very one of a kind'. The 'very' is already implied by the 'one of a kind' designation to begin with. (Yes, how many times do you think I've heard that? I'm not really sure, but I know that I can say the speech under my breath along with him whenever it comes up.)
  


• And the Number One Most Irritating Expression is........At the end of the day Used in excess, that does get annoying. (Few who use it realize that 'at the end of the day' another day that's likely to be just as crappy as the one that's ending and being turned into a parable. And that's really not useful or helpful at the time when it's being said. For the fifth time in the same conversation.)
  

Up for what would equate to an Honorable Mention would be other phrases that irritate people such as "literally" and "ironically", especially when those words are misused or used out of context. Ironically would be the one that I'd guess most people misuse. If you said to ten different people, "Define irony" I would guess that at least half (and that's a very low underestimate because, as we know, people are morons) would respond with "It's what you do to your clothes so that they're not so wrinkled." No, that's ironing, you idiot! But nice try. Thank you for playing.

The irritation that people have with these expressions was explained by the author of the squid book (or is it squib book?) Butterfield said: "We grow tired of anything that is repeated too often – an anecdote, a joke, a mannerism." Yes! Things such as three synonyms for the same expression, perhaps.

Oh, the ironing.

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