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Friday, July 30, 2010
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Paul. The Octopus. That is correct. If you're unfamiliar with Paul, allow me to familiarize you. Paul is an octopus. It's right there in his name. According to the folks across the pond at The Telegraph Paul "...became an international star after predicting the outcome of all seven German World Cup matches accurately." The way I understand how that worked was someone would put a little octopus treat into two different containers, each one labeled with the flag of the country that was playing in the match. Whichever treat Paul selected was assumed to be his pick for the winner of the match. Paul not only selected the winner once, he selected the winner seven times. (Granted, I don't think that Paul knew what in the world he was doing other than getting himself a little snack, but that's what happened.)
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Here's the scoop: According to the San Francisco Chronicle (which is so liberal it probably wets itself every time one of these rulings gets handed down) "...the law entitles wheelchair users at a restaurant to the same view as everyone else at the food that awaits them - in this case, burritos, tacos and the rest of the fare at Chipotle Mexican Grill." Does it now? Does it really?
KGTV-10 in San Diego says that "...the wall at the counter was too tall for people in wheelchairs to see over, to pick out their ingredients and to see their food being prepared." OK, look...I'm not trying to be a callous hard ass here, but are they serious? And when I say "they" I'm referring to a one Maurizio Antoninetti and his attorney, a one Amy Vandeveld. There are other names that come to mind, but that's what I'm going with.
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
According to the newsy folks over there at the NY Daily News, a local restaurant called Serendipity 3 (I'm not sure what's up with Serendipities 1 and 2) created the world's most expensive hot dog at $69. Now, if you're wondering what goes into a $69 hot dog (which they call the "haute dog" in a failed effort at being cutesy), so was I. Seriously, it's a hot dog. Do you know what goes in a hot dog? Everything but the oink, that is correct. How are you going to have a $69 hot dog? Easy. The same way you could have a $89 hot dog or a $109 hot dog. You charge that much and then you get someone to buy it.
Sunday, July 25, 2010
That's all why I was not overly interested when I heard that, at $770 per bottle, a brewery in Fraserberg, Scotland, is selling a new Belgian blonde ale which is 55 percent alcohol. It's the process to make the beer which the brewers claim is the reason for the exorbitant expense. Apparently they need to keep the beer at far below freezing temperatures so that water separates from the solution. They apparently repeat that process a gazillion times and it takes hundreds of liters of the beer in order to make just one 330 ml bottle. Granted, it's a super boozy bottle, but it's still just one.
Is the process necessary? I have no idea. And while I have a fondness for beer, I don't have much of an interest in drinking a $770 bottle of beer. I just don't. That's not what beer is about. You know what else beer isn't about? Dead rodent road kill that are all taxidermied up with the bottle of beer shoved down inside them. Wait. What? Behold!
Saturday, July 24, 2010
I found the sub-heading to be of little help, as it read "A transvestite had sex with a dog in the moat of an English Heritage castle". Yes, we know that. We just read that. OK, the part about the moat was new. But other than that, it's pretty much the same. No need to repeat. But, my God, what is wrong with you, sir?
In case you were wondering, said transvestite "...was wearing a black dress and walking around the steep-walled, empty moat." No word on what kind of shoes or bag, if any. But a black dress on a beautiful Saturday morning? Seems a bit somber to me. Not as somber as what was about to happen, but still pretty somber. When the transvestite saw the two women, he ran away (as they are known to due in their natural habitat). But it's later where things really start to pick up. That's when "...one of the dogs chased after the man; by the time the women had caught up, the man was having sex with the pet." Good Lord. So many questions. So, SO many questions.
My main question is how long did it take these women to find the dog? That is one dog-screwing transvestite that doesn't mess around, let me tell you. Gets right down to business, that one does. Did the mood just strike him or something? Seriously, who sees a dog running past them when they're cross dressing in a black dress whilst wandering about the outside of a castle and thinks, "I'm gonna get me some of that!" Holy canoli, man. And what do you say when you encounter something like that. "Stop that" just doesn't seem like enough, you know?
Friday, July 23, 2010
They don't know whether it was a dildo or not. It doesn't take a scientist with a fancy Swedish name to figure that out. That Gruber guy said, "Perhaps instead of, or in addition to, its sexual purpose, the object may have been used as a tool, such as to chip flakes of flint". What? I understand the part about "instead of", but I became a bit confused with the infusion of "in addition to". Are they saying that ancient dildos also doubled as some sort of a chisel? That doesn't seem like a very good idea at all. (First of all, you really need to hold that chisel steady to get the most effective cut. It can't be slipping and sliding all over the place, you know.)
Thursday, July 22, 2010
Today, I thought that I was finally going to get a glimpse of all that I had longed for when I saw a link over at People.com that said "See Lindsay Lohan Getting Handcuffed". Now, I got pretty excited because from what I had read, the judge had ordered no pictures or video be taken when she was getting cuffed. I figured that this had to be some sort of rogue photo that someone managed to sneak and then promptly sold to People for a gazillion dollars. I couldn't click fast enough. I was, as you can imagine, sorely disappointed. Not to mention, I was a little irritated as well. This is what they showed me. Behold!